Mind the Kids - Monitoring versus Knowing: Rethinking the Parent-Child Dynamics

Duration: 32 mins Publication Date: 13 Aug 2025 Next Review Date: 13 Aug 2028 DOI: 10.13056/acamh.13784

Description

In this episode of Mind The Kids, our host for this series is Mark Tebbs who welcomes Isabel Aks and Professor William Pelham from the University of California, San Diego, for an insightful conversation on “Monitoring versus Knowing: Rethinking the Parent-Child Dynamics.” Drawing on their recent research published in JCPP Advances (https://doi.org/10.1002/jcv2.70008), the trio explores what parental monitoring really means today—and why it’s much more than just (as Mark's son says) “another name for spying.” Isabel explains how parental monitoring is often misunderstood as snooping, when in reality it’s about the everyday ways parents stay connected to their children’s lives, from casual check-ins to knowing their friends and routines. William, a clinical child psychologist, highlights the delicate balance between keeping kids safe and respecting their growing independence—especially in the digital age, where technology has transformed how parents and teens interact. Together, they discuss how trust is the foundation of effective monitoring, and how open communication—not just gathering information—builds stronger parent-child relationships. The conversation also unpacks the evolution of research in this area, shifting focus from simply what parents know to what they actually do to foster connection and care. With practical advice and real-world examples, this episode is essential listening for parents, clinicians, and anyone interested in the changing landscape of family life. Tune in to discover why intentional, adaptable, and caring approaches to monitoring can help families thrive, even as the world—and childhood—rapidly change.

Learning Objectives

1. Define parental monitoring as everyday parental connection, not spying. 2. Understand balancing child safety with adolescent independence, especially digitally. 3. Explain the role of trust and communication in effective monitoring. 4. Summarize research on parental behaviors that foster connection. 5. Identify practical, adaptable strategies for caring parental monitoring.


Paper Link

https://doi.org/10.1002/jcv2.70008

About this Lesson

Speakers

Mark Tebbs

Mark Tebbs

Experienced charity CEO, an executive coach, and freelance consultant

}